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This weekend seemed to fly by without any relaxation or downtime at home. Friday night I did my grocery shopping. Saturday morning we got up and went walking and came across a yard sale. I got a baby jogger stroller for $25! woohoo. Now, it's old but seems to be in good shape, I just need to spend a few more minutes cleaning it. We also bought a bicycle trailer thingy to hold a kid. (I have no idea what they are called.) It was $25 too so I couldn't pass it up. We keep saying we need to ride bikes more often so maybe next year we will. Saturday I also rode around and did a few errands, dropped off thrift store load, jewelry and Lowes. Then we dropped off Allison with a friend so we could go to Taryn & Wil's wedding shower fiesta party. They actually had a commercial grade margarita machine there :) Jeff got to hear a few conversations of moody/stressed girls taking it out on their husbands, which made us laugh, but I hope secretly he saw that I'm really not THAT bad :) We didn't want to burden the babysitter too long or get Allison too off schedule, so we left about 8 to pick her up and get home. oh, the babysitter was just a friend who has 3 boys and wanted to play with a little girl. One of her kids likes babies and evidently did a great job of keeping Allison giggling.

Jeff has not been sleeping well, so he took two Tylenol PM at 10pm, for the first time ever. Well, Allison got me up a few times, meaning I didn't sleep good, so Sunday morning Jeff was still groggy, I was cranky and we had to get ready to go see Aaron at the lakehouse. We somehow got out the door about 9am and made it down there at 11. Aaron and Karen's baby Owen, is just 5 weeks younger than Allison and both were concieved in Alaska. He is a cute lil chunk and weighs more than Allison. He was not feeling very good between a cold and stomach issues. I knew Karen was exhausted and had a much rougher night than I did. I couldn't help but think if I were her, I would hate me. Here I come to visit and I have this smiley happy baby that only cried for the minute before she got a bottle. The guys got to play in the water, while Karen and I chilled out in the shade. Allison ofcourse didn't want to take a nap, but she did fall asleep for much of her first boat ride. We had a good visit and next time the kids should be old enough to play together. We got home about 8pm, gave Allison a bath, fed her and bam our weekend was over. Seems like it was a quick flash but I guess we did alot.

Tonight is supposed to be concerts in the park, but I'm not sure if the rain I'm looking at right now will make it muddy.

I wonder if she could be a little overstimulated? :)

No, that's the look she always give for the camera.

Jeff's really belated birthday present came today. I signed us up for Thai cooking lessons at a nearby restaurant. It was good to learn more about the owners and overall have a better appreciation for what you eat. We made Shrimp Lemongrass Salad and Pad Thai with chicken and shrimp. It was really good (even if I left the onions out of mine). The salad part we made at a table set up in the restaurant, so I was excited to hear that they were letting us back in the kitchen to cook on the stove in a skillet. Jeff even showed off some flipping skillet skills. It was fun and I'm glad we did it, but it all reminded me of how much you have to chop up and prepare to cook and then you eat it all in a matter of minutes. I think I'd prefer to just pay a little more and go out to eat. So they didn't loose any of our business by offering the class :)

(photo taken with my new Iphone - I love having it everywhere with me :)

Allison discovered her feet a couple weeks ago. I think she still prefers her hands since they go in her mouth easier. It's so cute when she pulls on her feet like she's trying to stick her booty out. She has not mastered rolling over yet, but she's close because she's always arching her back. She's still a happy smiling baby. My next fear in parenthood is the teething process. Right now Allison sleeps so good - from about 7:30pm to 6 am with only one or 2 trips in there from us to give her a pacifier. My sister scared me when she said that her kids started sleeping in their bed when they were fussy b/c of teething. I guess only time will tell.

On the feeding front, I'm very close to closing down the boobie milk factory. I had arbitrarily picked a goal of 6 months to make it in breastfeeding. Well, that got shot down when I went back to work and had a boss that holds 3 hour meetings. A couple times I left them early for fear of leaking through my shirt. So I survived one month of pumping 2 or 3 times a day at work. I thought that was pretty good - she was 4 months old almost exclusively breastfed. Then I gradually cut out a pumping session at a time and now I'm down to just mornings. And that will get shut down next week, right around her 5 month birthday. I never had a strong opinion for either side of the breast vs bottle debate, but I did go through 2 AGONIZING weeks of learning to breastfeed with some pain beyond that, so when it did become easy (about 2 months later - ha) and I didn't want to give it up just because of work. Then I went to work and changed my mind again :) I gave it my best shot for a while, and I'm proud of myself for as long as I made it.
Now Allison is getting cereal at daycare once a day and thank goodness, those ladies are getting most of the bad diapers, b/c OMG, they are bad. I know it's just going to get worse later and both Jeff and I are in trouble b/c we both gagged this weekend. I thought of that America's funniest video clip of the compilation of 20+ dads gagging, pinching noses, wearing protective armor, while changing diapers.

Other parts of life are just rolling on. I did have a ladies jewelry night at my house this week that was alot of fun. I think I had 11 friends over and served blueberry lemonade martinis. oh yummy. I still don't think I've had more than 2 drinks in one night though. I'm a lightweight after going so long without during pregnancy and breastfeeding. I think I need some practice before our beach trip in September. Greg and Claire's babysitting duties may run over into the next day. haha.

Something hit me this morning and I realized this summer marks 20 years that I've lived in Alabama. ALABAMA. Oh, how I cried when I was 13 and my mom said I was to move here. So I packed up my life in Texas in 2 days, drove back here with my dad and started 8th grade. There were many changes that made it hard (besides the obvious family change) - how most people talked funny with that slow southern draw, how peoples first question was what church I went to or who my favorite New Kid on the Block was, everything about a much smaller school and more stuff I guess my brain has just absorbed as normal for around here. Luckily I made friends with the other tall girl so I didn't look like the only freak, and the headbanger chic since I wasn't into NKOTB and it worked out. I actually had a major personality change after moving up here. When I was younger in a bigger school system I was painfully shy, and for some reason I did a 180 up here. Maybe it was the parental change of having a dad and a stepmom (a woman with a strong personality and overall a better role model than my mom), or maybe it was that wildly fun and crazy tall girl Jenny, who knows, but I'm actually glad I'm here now. It has taken many years to accept the fact that Alabama is ok. It's fun (and scary) to wonder how my life would have been different if I had all the things I wanted - to stay in Texas or go to UT in Austin. Would I have run away to get away from my stepdad, would I have turned to boys for attention and gotten knocked up in highschool like an old friend there, or would I have been shot in highschool (yeah the schools were rough), would I have even gone to college and discovered I had some artistic talent? All I know is that those scary changes made a wonderful impact on my life. I grew up with hard working parents that pushed me to succeed and I think I did that before starting a new chapter in life with my own family.

I'm much too tired to come up with stuff to write, but I've been on the computer editing photos some more. We attempted another photoshoot with grandpa this weekend. Here is one of those 'too-adorable-for-words' gifts we got recently. What do you know it came from a dentist - so she can reach the sink to brush her teeth :)

I was reading some mommy blog about how the 3 month old stage is the best. While I don't have a comparison since she's the first, she did point out some wonderful points that I notice with Allison.

She smiles so much now. You just can't help but be in a better mood when a cute little baby is smiling back at you.

She can entertain herself. I've laid Allison in her crib to watch her mobile while I put up her laundry or just put her bouncy seat on the kitchen table to watch me do dishes. Usually she does pretty good for 15 or 20 min.

She's content to be held. Though I think she's sick of our living room as the scenery.

She's not grabby yet. She's still working on her coordination to grab the items you dangle in front of her, but she's certainly not grabbing my dinner plate yet :)

yeah - her head is finally stable and she's easy to carry around. (guess this has been the case for several weeks now, just didn't write about it.) I feel like that was a milestone that opened up a bunch of options.

Observant - you can really tell when she's focusing on something and I can just imagine all the brain cells getting turned on. It's fun to watch.

I survived Jeff being gone for a week of travel. It was hard since I got up at 5 am to get most things done before waking up Allison. And the worst part of that was she got her 4 month shots one afternoon. So I kept her dosed on Tylenol for 24 hours. I also survived a week of minimal breastfeeding. I'm only feeding her once in the morning and twice at night. I may continue that for a couple more weeks and then try to stop all together. I had high hopes of making it 6 months but it's difficult trying to pump at work and worry about leaking through my shirt. Yep, had to give you that visual, sorry if it's tmi :)
As of last week Allison was 13.8 pounds and 24.5 inches long with a big head for that size. I've been told the big head comes from the father's side.
Jeff's parents are here this weekend and grandpa had a photoshoot yesterday. This photo with Ginger (cat) made me laugh.
I have a long to-do list started on my Iphone that includes stroller shopping, catching up on thank you notes for some too-adorable-for-words gifts (quilt and step stool in particular), freelance work, researching baby proofing the house, cleaning and more cleaning before a party next week. oh and I'll need a nap today so we can finally make it out downtown to party with friends. yeah!

What a treat for July - at noon it was 75 degrees out and partly cloudy. Here's how we spent some time outside on a lazy Sunday.

I took this cute photo of Allison the other morning. She's been sleeping like this lately with her hands behind her head. She does several things that make me worried she's going to push her ears out like dumbo :)

From this angle it looks like she's sitting on a ball, well more like a water balloon. I'm still amazed at how much diapers can hold over night. We've given daycare the cheaper diapers, but I'll only buy Pampers for at home. I may start buying Pampers for daycare; she's blowing out an outfit everyday it seems. yuck!

Last Thursday I took Allison to the dr, as recommended by the daycare workers. She was just fine. I stayed home with her to make sure she was ok for a long weekend in Indiana, sure enough. So we got on the road early Friday morning. We went to cousin Jennifer's that night and Saturday morning went into Brookville to see the rest of the clan. There was a nice big party for Jeff's grandma's 88th birthday. When I say big, I mean she had 5 kids there with spouses, at least 11 grandkids there some with spouses, and I think 11 great-grand kids there. We all sang happy birthday to her, someone said something nice about being surrounded by family and then funny man Mark said something like "look at what all you did". I thought it was funny anyway. Kinda made me think about being a mom and creating life and more generations.

Allison weighed in at 13.1 pounds last week. She'll get weighed again tomorrow before they give her shots for her 4 month checkup. Last time she got shots she had pain screams that were just horrible, so I'm dreading tomorrow night. And daycare wont give Tylenol, so I guess I'll be running up there at lunch. Because as soon as she has a fever they kick her out. On a happy note, she is starting to grab stuff. Its really cute when she's in deep concentration staring at something trying to figure out how to get it or whatever she's thinking. Ofcourse everything she gets goes straight to her mouth. She's still working on getting her whole fist in her mouth too :)

Jeffs parents will be visiting again soon. Those are about the only visitors we get. I'm a little sad to think that my family will have big gaps in watching her grow up. My parents will see her once or twice a year and who knows when my brother or sister will come. I guess I knew that since we're the only ones that live in town we'd be doing it on our own, but sometimes the emotions hit hard and it does feel like Jeff and I are in seclusion. Guess I need to quit posting pics online and writing on this thing and maybe people would come around more.

So in writing that little sappy bit it made me remember something Rob Thomas said at a Matchbox Twenty concert. He said something about yes he knows they have more sad songs than happy songs, but when he's happy he's out having fun, not putting a pen to paper and sitting around at home.

So I'm about to look up some fun things to do.

Something in that long weekend must have spoiled Allison. She's been fussy at daycare the last 2 days. We're still not sure whats going on. She's still on breastmilk thats been frozen, so I have no idea if it's something I ate, or maybe she just needs more entertainment.
For a while now she's been all about her hands in her mouth, and then just in the last week she's started grabbing things better. She even held her own bottle for about 20 seconds. That may have been a fluke thing :) I keep forgetting to ask daycare if she's done that. So while she's discovered her hands, she hasn't found her feet yet.

I was playing with the video on my new Iphone and posted a video to YouTube. It's Jeff playing and talking to Allison and getting that cute baby talk back. I still need to work my videography skills. haha.

I attempted an step and sculpt aerobics class yesterday that kicked my butt. I was worried I wouldn't be able to walk today, but my legs are just the right about of soreness. I may have to try it again next week :)

We had a fun weekend in Birmingham with the Machamers. The guys got their fix of card playing in, and Karen and Claire didn't seem to fight over baby time :) We even took Allison to a restaurant/bar and sat in their outdoor patio area. Our main purpose was to try some of the new high gravity beers that Hsv does not have yet. Allison was a great baby and I think liked having new stuff to check out. The problem came on the ride home when we got stuck in 4th of July fireworks traffic. She was screaming and poor auntie Claire tried her hardest to calm her down. We didn't think of it till later, we probably should have turned the light on so she could see better. Anyway, 30+ minutes in a car with a crying baby stressed me out like I haven't been before. At home crying isn't as big a deal b/c you can try multiple options to fix it but in a car you're trapped. I'm laughing now knowing Allison won't ever remember that, but I sure was worked up. And my other worry is that episode may have been another year of birth control for Claire. I really hope not ;)

Earlier we said we wouldn't show her any tv, but now we're considering a portable dvd player and Baby Einstein for a future long road trip. I guess I could keep the tv to a special treat only available in the car.

Here's a photo of Greg drooling over his creation

Life is back to busy so I don't get to blog as often. Jeff and I have not watched TV for an entire week. Seems like that was half our life pre-baby. I had someone ask me what we do when we get home and I laughed. Most of it is consumed with Allison. Since I only see her awake a few hours a day during week, I'd like to spend it with her. The other part is taken up with washing bottles and laundry. After she goes to bed we usually get on the computer.

I'm very thankful that a few things have fallen into place at the right time. Allison is still sleeping through the night which makes working an 8-9 hour day possible. I also am able to fit into most of my workout clothes which times out good with my company paying for a gym membership. Now, I'm still having trouble finding an extra hour in the day to workout. I think that will be easier in a few months when I'm not breastfeeding anymore. In more ways than ever, my life is revolving around how big my boobs are. .... for instance, I think I'll get on the treadmill first thing on the morning, nope boobs hurt, so I get in the shower and ack, they're dripping everywhere. Or I get to work and the boss springs a 3 hour meeting and I think crap, when do I have to pump. ...stuff like that makes it hard, but I also hate making and washing bottles. I'm sure it'll always be something now that this little person comes first but thats ok :)

In other news both Jeff and I have the new Iphone. This should hopefully help me since I now fit into that category of who I considered crazy people who had to be able to be reached at all possible times. For example, yesterday (when I didn't have my new Iphone) I left my phone in the car and went into the gym. Jeff was going to pick up Allison from daycare. I get out to the car and there is a message that he's changing a flat tire. he was still able to get her in time (before the late fees started) but that wont have to happen again since I'll be using my phone as an mp3 player from now on :) It's still going to be a while before it's a habit to always have the phone on me - in meetings or in earshot in the car or a store but I'll get there.

I forgot to mention how talkative Allison is lately. Last weekend we tried hard to get her to say dada for fathers day but it hasn't happened yet. I'll record some of her babbles and then play with the Iphone this weekend and see just how easy it is to load videos to Utube.

It's almost time for me to walk out in the is smoldering 98 degrees to go home. Whatever happened to the nice but hot 85 degree weather?

We had a busy but fun weekend. Saturday afternoon I had a stampin up thing where I made some greeting cards. I'm not usually into that kind of thing but I learned that this lady has classes where you just pay one fee and she has all the materials and you spend half a day for a project such as Christmas cards. So I may consider a few of those a year instead of spending money to own all the materials. I know I would never spend that time in my own house doing it.
Saturday night some friends had a bbq that Jeff and Allison went to. She ofcourse saved her blowout for an outing. I came after the stampin thing but it was 8pm and I was pretty wiped out, so I didn't stay long.

Sunday we went to Sears for some photos. I've been looking up some photographers that specialize in babies but the prices are crazy and they ofcourse won't sell you the digital images. So I figured since she's still working on the head control and not exactly smiling on cue, we'd try sears. It wasn't a great experience - hot room, busy place with just one person working, hardly any props, and we just seemed rush. Allison was pretty good, but I still stressed out. So for all that work and $150 we only got 14 images. I think I'll just be shelling out the money for her 6 months pics and try a photography studio.

For Fathers Day I got Jeff lawn service for a month. Came at a good time since we've been in the 90s for a while now. The Friday before Fathers Day, Allison came home with her first piece of art. It was her footprints with a poem for fathers day. I laughed at how they start so early. I bought some posterboard to fold over and create a big folder for all her art projects to save. My mom saved mine from elementary school and it was kinda neat to look back on. If anyone has suggestions for how or what to store that kind of stuff in, I'd like some ideas.

and she made it till 4:50 before waking me. Yippee! I got her home about 4:15, she ate at 5pm slept, woke up to let us know about a dirty diaper and slept again. woke up about 7:30 and we had about 30 minutes of play time in before she ate again and slept from 8:20 to 4:50. I hope this isn't fluke thing.

On other news my dad is in the hospital with a blood clot in his leg. Sounds kinda scary but I was told I didn't need to fly down there right now. I hope the doctors in that small town know what they are doing and can dissolve it.

Allison is 3 months old today and life is definitely different than it was when she was 1 month old. We've got the beginning of a routine started. I get up a little before 6am and shower first while Jeff wakes her up enough to eat. Then I throw on my robe, pull back wet hair and feed her while Jeff showers. Then he'll take her to daycare about 7am while I finish getting ready for work. I'm still able to get to work about 7:45 or 8am most days. So far I haven't taken a full lunch break so I try to leave a little after 4 to pick her up. They feed her 3 bottles in dc but she must know I have more food b/c she's usually screaming in the car and in the house till she eats. some days she's still a little fussy in the evenings, but it's not too bad. Allison typically sleeps from 8 am to 3 am and then I feed her. She usually falls back asleep -me, not so much. I lay there hungry! If I do eat something before going back to bed it wakes me up more. I'm open to ideas on how to resolve that :) There is a downside to her sleeping through most of the night. My period started. I feel like calling my doctor and saying YOU LIED.

I'm still breastfeeding and pumping at work. Thank goodness I have an office to myself right now, so I just shut the door and close the blinds. The hardest part is trying to time my day around pumping. I have to attend a few meetings a week and sometimes they are in other buildings. I also signed up for an all day photoshop training seminar in Nashville and I'm thinking it's going to suck trying to find a place to pump in that convention center or go out to a hot car in June. This is starting to take some serious dedication. But I really wanted to keep bf'ing for the first part of her transition into daycare.

(now this is written on Sunday night)
Jeff's parents came up Friday night so we could go to a friends wedding. We we all surprised at how much Allison slept this weekend. I think the full week in daycare really wiped her out. One time this morning, I put Allison in the bouncy seat and she was out asleep in minutes and her Mimi (grandma) was sitting next to her just staring with this disappointed look on her face, so sad she was back asleep and not playful. I was just happy she was still a happy calm baby all weekend.

Here's a pic of bathtime Friday night. She looks like she's in distress, but she' pretty good for baths :)

So I've gotten some response back on that last blog entry - very nice and supportive words. One of the reasons I felt I had to get those words out is b/c everything you see on tv or in advertising just paints a perfect picture of life with new baby where mom has this pre-planted supercharged bond that keeps a happy loving smile on her face nonstop. Those advertisements need to come with subtext that says the baby is 3 or 6 months old and mom has finally slept 7 hours in a row.
Now that more of the 'life is really good' feelings are occurring on a daily basis I'm forgetting the bad and hard stuff. My memory already sucks, so I wanted to make sure I had something to remind me of the real truth :)

while reading this keep in mind it's coming from the mouth of a woman that hasn't been around babies much in her life....

I brought home a tiny baby from the hospital (never thought I'd have a baby that small). Even a couple days in the hospital it really didn't sink in what we produced. I wasn't one of those moms that formed an attachment right away, but there was a point when I got back from the hospital nursery I realized I had missed her. She looked so small and fragile, the thought of caring for her was a little frightening. Luckily I remembered my sister's words - you can't hurt them unless you drop them :) Those words ran through my head every time I had to get clothes on her and contort her arms to move in ways I didn't think they should. The first couple weeks went by in a sleepless, painful blur of mostly crying fits while breastfeeding. After a couple weeks all the family left, Jeff was at work, friends weren't visiting too often and it was just me and her, and she was still just eating and sleeping. It began to hit me - what am I supposed to do with her all day?! We weren't on a schedule by any means and the thought of taking her out in public and her screaming was very intimidating. How could I be completely intimidated by something that weighed 7 pounds! So my only ventures out were to the grocery store or Target.
A couple days before she turned 4 weeks old, we gave her a bottle. Yes - we did not have any problems there. I thought this meant freedom for me to use both bottle and breast. Nope, I found out what engorgement was. I didn't see the point of having Jeff get up in the middle of the night if I was just going to have to get up to use the breast pump. Several nights when she was eating every 2 hours, he'd give her the first bottle, but then I'd be up at 2 and 4 am at least. I don't think we took her out to eat with us though till she was maybe 8 weeks old. (yeah for quick mexican restaurants). I'd say I didn't feel like I could recognize any kind of schedule with her till she was at least 7 weeks old. that meant for long boring frustrating days at home.
I think mother nature timed things out right, because about the point where she was taking longer naps during the day and night, allowing me to get sleep and not be as cranky, is when Allison also started smiling at as and making a few cute baby sounds. So I think sleep plus smiles are what really sealed the bond between us. Some delay there could have also been my emotional rollercoaster on a daily basis. I probably just made myself out to sound like a horrible mom for admitting that connection took weeks for me to feel but it makes a difference when that little person can respond back to you in a pleasant way. Now I look forward to the time I get to feed her because I have her all to myself.
I knew the first time baby process was going to be hard, but yeah, you don't really know till it happens. Allison is such a good baby, we really did luck out. I would have had a institutional-worthy breakdown if she was colicky or unhealthy. Then again I never thought I'd survive natural childbirth and I did.

trying to steal a few minutes on a lunch break to blog...

Daycare said Allison did great and was a happy baby. They got her to eat every 3-3.5 hours which is nice. She fell asleep in the car seat on the way home and when she woke up at home she went into full scream mode. I have no idea why, maybe she likes daycare better, maybe she already forgot who I was, who knows. I had to feed her to calm down though, and then she stayed a bit fussy for a while. She's staying alert longer though. Since my back is still bothering me, I can't walk her around too long, so we sat her in the bumbo seat in her crib and turned on her mobile and other rainforest musical and she seemed perfectly content to look at those 2 back and forth.
My only guess on the back thing is that its a breastfeeding issue. I weigh alot less than when I was pregnant and my back didn't hurt this bad. So maybe it's my huge boobs or me just looking down at them while keeping her on. It's becoming a problem though when I get home and don't have time to lay down in between all the bottle washing and playing with Allison.
The last few nights she's only eaten about 3 am. That's nice for me except I need to find a way to fall back asleep faster. At least she's a happy baby in the morning. She really does smile and coo alot, which is good to lesson my crankiness. haha.

back to cleaning out hundreds of work emails after being gone so long...